His retreating figure
by HeyThereSummerBoy
Summary: Kurt and The New Direction ladies have gone shopping for the afternoon. There's a surprise guest. So what if Kurt has non-filtered friends? So what if he likes to watch Sebastian walk away? Tumblr prompt. Kurtbastian oneshot.


This was something I posted on my tumblr about a month ago, but I'm just moving everything here.

"Va te faire foutre." - fuck you

Song used was Rita Ora's How We Do.

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On the late morning of the Friday after a sleepover, Santana and Kurt were joined by Rachel and Mercedes for a trip to the mall to get outfits for the party and some.

"Put that… that thing down right now Rachel Berry." Kurt hissed as he saw Rachel hold up a grey sweater with yellow and blue carousel ponies printed on the front of it.

"Kurt, it's adorable. With the perfect plaid skirt it–"

"Shut the hell up. Just shut up. God, Your whiny voice is a squeakier cross over version of that thing on the grudge and a cats' nails on a chalk board."

"Santana," Kurt said as he glared at her, "That was really rude."

She shrugged, "Well it's not like you weren't thinking it."

He looked like he was trying to scowl at her, but the sparkle in his eyes when he looked at his best friend gave him away. "I wasn't thinking it. Rude."

Mercedes giggled at the scene playing out in front of her. Mercedes had gotten closer to Rachel as of recent. It's not as if since Santana and Kurt had gotten closer that they'd drifted, it was more of the fact that they'd never actually just been Mercedes and Rachel. They were Mercedes, Kurt & Rachel. So when Santana and Kurt happened, Rachel and Mercedes thought that they would attempt at being friends and so far it was really working for them.

She rolled her eyes and she apologized, "Ugh, fine. I'm sorry, Yentl." To say Mercedes and Rachel looked surprised would be an understatement. Kurt then put an arm around his Latina friend's waist, gave her a smile, and pulled her closer to his body.

Kurt and Santana had spent a bit of time together as of the past few months and he knew that her insults were mostly a defense mechanism for her. She didn't know how to react to unexpected kind gestures or "be nice" per say, but she was trying hard. They were actually a good team. When Brittany and Artie broke up and she didn't know what to do, Santana went straight to Kurt. Kurt and Santana ended up skipping school and instead drove to her house. They spent the whole day in the pyjamas - Kurt had left a pair there the last time he had slept over –eating ice-cream and watching movies like Fool's Gold, Serendipity, Moulin Rouge as well as, unknown to them at the time, starting the tradition of sexy time.

"Back to the issue at hand then Rachel, how old are we turning?"

"We're turning 18." When Rachel said this, her eyes brightened up. She and Kurt had gotten their acceptance letters for NYADA this week, she and Finn were doing fantastically, and she was turning 18. This was indeed a beautiful age for Miss Rachel Berry.

"My point has been proven. I think that if we tried a little bit we could have every guy in this mall trying to jump your bones." They all started giggling but Santana just rolled her eyes and disappeared to goodness knows where.

"But I can't pull off the sexy look Kurt. It's not me."

"Hey, hey now," he pulled her into a hug and kissed the top of her head, "you're beautiful. Of course you can. With a little help from me, but you still could. Don't say that."

"I just. I don't know. I feel like I'm not good enough for Finn. He could be with someone prettier, but I don't want to be exactly like those girls. I don't want to be an 'option' for him.

"Rachel honey, you're 3 steps above them. You already have Finn, you actually have a personality that isn't as lame as that sweater you looked at just now," Rachel mustered up the best glare she could give at that moment and Kurt just chuckled at her before he continued, "and you are beautiful. Don't freak out."

"I'm back bitches. Oh, and umm, hobbit…" Santana almost looked ashamed at what she was doing. In her hands, she had clothes she held out for Rachel.

Rachel looked frazzled for a moment before she addressed the girl standing in front of her, "Are you going to attack me? What am I supposed to do with those?"

"Oh my God shut up, just go try them on. I took a little detour whilst you and your highness were talking" She sounded exasperated.

"Oh. Okay, thanks Santana."

Kurt, Mercedes and Santana sat on the couch allocated for boyfriends or friends that had to give obligatory catcalls to whomever they were waiting for. It was a secluded area so whoever you were with could model the clothes without any worry about random strangers in passing gaping at them whilst they tried to convince themselves to just purchase the outfit.

"Satan. You're a genius." Santana and Mercedes looked up and saw Rachel. A Cheshire cat grin spread itself on the beautiful Latina's face and Mercedes just stared.

"God, Santana. You look like, smoking hot Rach." Rachel blushed as Mercedes complimented her. She didn't think that she'd look nice in this outfit seeing as it wasn't something she'd usually got for herself, but when she put it on she felt empowered. She felt like she had the power for the first time and it felt damn good.

Santana had chosen a skin tight maroon dress paired with a stonewash denim crop jacket and a pair of black stilletos. The dress however, was sleeveless and it hugged her body in all the right places. Rachel had really never felt so sexy in her life.

"You're next, Mariah." Santana smirked in Mercedes' direction as she stood up and grabbed a hold on Kurt's hand in impatience. "Come on hot stuff, let's go find you, me and Cedes over here something hot."

Kurt allowed himself to be pulled off the couch by Santana after he asked Rachel and Mercedes if they'd be okay, but they were too busy freaking out over Rachel to notice their absence.

When they had started going through clothes, Kurt finally broke their comfortable silence.

"You did good San."

She shrugged. "We all know I did."

"I'm proud of you."

"Whatever. She usually looks like a toddler and her sweaters were gross, I thought I was going to hurl."

"I'm still proud of you honey."

Santana seldom blushed, but when she did, her long eye lashes caressed the top of her warm, tinted and now pink cheeks and the faintest of smiles would appear on her beautiful face.

"Let's just go find something to for all of us to wear okay? We gotta look hot for out dates." She winked and Kurt just giggled.

Truth was that he was really nervous for the party. He didn't know what type of drunk he was, seeing as he'd never experienced over-zealous amounts of alcohol in his system since the Bambi incident but he also hoped that he wouldn't do anything embarrassing.

She held up a vertically blue striped high-waist skirt and an off the shoulder burnt orange shirt to go with it. "What do you think?"

"Well you've made it impossible to look half as good as Cedes and Rachel will but let's see what we can get for us, shall we?" He then held his arm out for her in a very Renaissance ball-esque manner and they walked around the store looking for something for them to wear.

When Mercedes had tried on her outfit, everyone just gushed, and there were copious amounts of photo's that were being taken - One where Mercedes and Rachel posed with a pair of Ray Bands trying to look "bad ass", one when Santana had jumped onto Kurt's back and kissed his cheek while he laughed, even one when Santana and Rachel had been hugging. Kurt's favourite they had taken was a group photo of all four of them falling over the couch and laughing because the timer hadn't been set properly.

Mercedes and Rachel didn't really think Santana was bad – she was just someone you had to get used to, and since she and Kurt had become so close, they'd all gotten very acquainted with each other. But of course Santana would insult Rachel, and Rachel would get offended but usually just got over it and learned to accept that that was how Santana was. She had been much nicer to her as of recent.

Santana came out of the changing rooms wearing a pair of leather black high waist shorts that rested just below her bum and a leopard printed boob-tubed shirt with a pair of ankle boots paired with a few shiny chains around her neck, but before anyone could react to this Latina beauty Kurt casually strolled out of the changing rooms. he was clad in too-tight grey skinny jeans and a loose fitting white dress shirt slightly tucked with a leather jacket. He had decided to pair this outfit with a combination of Doc Martens and a studded belt.

"Lopez, if I wasn't gay!" Kurt exclaimed as she twirled in a little circle so he could see all sides of her.

Santana snorted. "Look at your ass Hummel. Just look at yourself, really now."

"Kurt, you look marvelous. Santana, you look so beautiful." Santana gave Rachel an honest smile and winked at her.

"You bet your ass on it, hobbit."

"Well it's safe to conclude that we're the hottest pieces of ass in this mall right now, so I think we should go dancing before the party. I'd say afterwards, but I have a strong feeling that half of us will be passed out in each other's vomit."

Rachel had her game face on. "You have a point."

Everyone thought about a possible solution for their dance plans while they were getting changed back into their own clothes. Once they had all finished getting dressed they ended up sitting right back up on the couch with the clothing they had intentions of purchasing on the couch's arm rest.

"Why don't we just go next week ladies? I don't want to go out. I'll be too tired to party." Mercedes said.

"Hell yeah bitches. This weekend is 'It'."

"Santana, speak in English. What is 'It'?" Rachel hated being out of the loop more than anything so she really did want to know what 'It' was.

"Porcelain here is getting hammered with Auntie Tannie."

"Kurt, is she serious?"

"Fuck yeah, I'm serious. He's always designated driver so it's time Porcelain let loose."

As if right on cue, How We Do started blasting through the speakers in the change room and Kurt gave a devilish smile before getting off the couch, winking at the girls and started shimmying a little.

_"I wanna party, and bullshit."_ Kurt sang.

Eventually they turned the song into a musical number of sorts and the girls and Kurt were dancing all around the change rooms and with each other. Santana and Kurt alternated throughout most of the lines of the song and Rachel and Mercedes alternated between the 'How We Do"'s.

"Well now, Merde dans ma gorge and tell me I'm hallucinating. I almost came and hit on you, before I saw who you were. Congratulations Gay Face, I'd almost tap that."

Exasperated from the singing and dancing, Kurt turned around and saw none other than Sebastian Smythe.

Apart from the nickname and the fluency of the French, Kurt still hadn't gotten used to the silky purr-like voice Sebastian had. He had never had a crush on this boy, but he had to admit to himself that he was a sight for sore eyes. It's not like Kurt was looking, but Sebastian was merely always there and Kurt had noticed little things about him. Ever since Kurt and Blaine had broken up, on mutual grounds, Sebastian had backed off of Blaine and instead focused on making Kurt's life a living hell.

"You're so eloquent. You know, you're the only person who could compliment, insult and disgust me simultaneously. Shit down your throat, Sebastian, really? That's the best you could come up with?"

"I'm gonna cut into this conversation before you two get all riled up and prissy, but that was a good one, meerkat. I applaud you."

"Chachi's right. That was a good one."

"Chachi?" Kurt queried. "See, originality right there and you couldn't come up with anything slightly more original than Gay Face?" Mercedes said.

"You watched Grease a lot as a kid, didn't you?" Rachel was in her own world now.

"Hummel doesn't mind, do you, princess?" he said, smirking at Kurt's eye roll. "And yes, Grease is one of my favorites."

"Va te faire foutre."

"Someone's feeling a bit frisky today."

"You wish."

"I really do."

"Why are you stalking me Sebastian? Oh my god." Kurt sighed exasperatedly.

Sebastian shrugged. "If we must dig a little into my personal space, then I'll tell you – I'm here getting some stuff for my brother. Your below-peasant public school has him working today so he asked me to get him some stuff, but I heard Chachi and your voices as I walked past and here I am."

"Back track, pretty boy. Your brother at McKinley? The hell is going on?"

Even Kurt was as confused as Mercedes. He knew that Sebastian had a brother but he didn't know his brother was none other than Mr. Smythe. He figured he should've guessed that it was bound to be a fact that there were not a lot of people in Lima, Ohio who could speak fluent French with the last name, "Smythe".

"He teaches French."

"No way! Mr Smythe and I are always having little conversations when no one else wants to be my partner in French. We talk about how bright a star I'm going to be once I'm out of Lima and living happily in New York with one of my best friends." Everyone just stared at Rachel because even though they expected this type of behaviour from Rachel, it still threw them off guard every now and again.

"Is that the hot French teacher?"

"He's fucking hot like a blazing bonfire." Before Kurt realized what he had said he put a hand over his mouth hoping to somehow take back the words. His brain only clicked afterwards that he had just said that his 23 year old Tyler Smythe who was related to Sebastian was 'Hot like fire.'

"Like fire, you say?" Sebastian chuckled.

"Shut up."

"All three of the Smythe's are gorgeous. I don't blame you."

"You're really modest." Rachel casually threw into the conversation.

"Whatever, Streisand. My sister's has always been a little heartbreaker."

"Sister?" Kurt chuckled.

"Three years old. Prettiest girl ever."Sebastian gushed. "Anyways, as much as I enjoy a nice chat with you ladies, I have to go."

Santana sighed. "What makes you think we even wanted you here?"

"Oh, I know you do. Until next time then- Babra, Whitney, Chachi, Princess, Au revoir."

"Do – do you want to come to a party tonight? " Rachel asked shyly. "Kurt and I are having a combined 18th and you can even bring a friend." She smiled.

He shrugged before answering. "You're lucky I don't have plans yet."

"Bullshit. As if you weren't going to spend the night in watching Gossip Girl. You prep school boys are all the same." Santana smirked and Mercedes just giggled. "Chace Crawford gets you and your little friend living in the cupboard under the stairs all hot and bothered, doesn't he?"

"First off, can't tell me you don't watch it either because I know if I was lesbian, I'd be all over Jessica Szohr." He shrugged. " Besides, I'm more of a Queer as Folk kind of guy."

Santana chuckled. "You have a point."

"But in any case, I'll see you later and we'll further discuss this. Oh and Hummel? I would definitely tap that." Sebastian spoke, giving the countertenor a once-over, and with his signature wink, he left Kurt and the girls to continue what they had being doing before he arrived. Okay, so _maybe Kurt had a little crush on Sebastian._

All the girls watched Sebastian's retreating figure. Kurt was watching Sebastian's ass.

"I hope you intend on tapping that ass Hummel, or I will be thoroughly disappointed in you."

Kurt chuckled. "Yes, Santana."

"No Kurt you don't get it," Rachel started. "He has a really nice ass."

"A really nice ass." Mercedes quipped.

"Perverts."

Santana deadpanned. "Kurt."

"He has a really, _really_ nice ass." Kurt conceded.

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